Holy Fuck It’s Hot

Dudes, I’m dying in here. My apartment is a SAUNA, and I chose today of all days to call Talea over to drink copious amounts of wine and turn the oven on all afternoon for a round of rock n’ roll baking. Super, I feel like I’m melting. There will be video footage of my bakeathon, but for now while the film is still on Talea’s camera so you’ll have to settle for a picture.

Yes, that is a rocking evil eye hand sign dealio for all those unfamiliar with Ozzy and everything else worth listening to. This pie spent nearly an hour in the oven while Talea and I melted on the couch, eating an entire tub of gelato to keep cool. And drank a ton of wine, thereby negating all cooling efforts.

Still, I did manage to accomplish the standard weekend chores of sweeping/mopping/dishes/clean cages for all four rabbits, three of which are excessively shedding rabbits/laundry/groceries/bills before noon, so I guess I can’t be too hard on myself for being exhausted.

I also managed to turn out some craftiness!

*not quite finished necklace

*not quite finished necklace

Okay that’s all for now folks, Josh is home and I need me some attention πŸ˜›


  1. Pure Evyl said,

    September 15, 2008 at 3:32 am

    A Heavy Metal Pie? That is awesome.

  2. September 15, 2008 at 4:16 pm

    Tell us about the bowl, Em. It looks pretty cool, but I didn’t know any such projects were on the slate. πŸ™‚

  3. September 15, 2008 at 5:47 pm

    must have a necklace. I’m so stoked about seeing all of this continue to grow πŸ™‚

  4. Allie said,

    September 15, 2008 at 6:46 pm

    I’m with Peter… tell us about the bowl! It’s freaking cool as hell!

  5. teeni said,

    September 15, 2008 at 8:41 pm

    Oops – I’m glad you mentioned the Ozzy evil eye thing because at first I didn’t notice it on the pie crust. The missing piece threw me all off. LOL.

    That really is a cool bowl. I’m with the others who want to hear more about it!

  6. CuriousC said,

    September 15, 2008 at 11:10 pm

    I LURVE the pie!!!

  7. Emerald said,

    September 15, 2008 at 11:21 pm

    @ PureEvyl: Ha, it was totally a last minute thing too. I was gonna be all Martha Stewart about it, and be all extra special with the fluting of the edges and the little heart cutouts and shit. And then we went to do the actual filming of it and I realized it was too hot to even consider putting on makeup so we went rock n’ roll. I think about halfway through I actually said “Fuck it, I’m not inviting my inlaws over, this is a rock n’ roll pie! I nearly died making it!” Terrific.

    @ Stephanie: Thanks, me too! I’m so glad I’m getting a really good reception so far, it’s really motivating! You guys, like, rule and stuff πŸ˜€

    @ Peter, Allie, and Teeni: Okay, so people love the bowl, awesome! There’s a pink version in the works too. Basically it’s just a little decorative bowl about…shit, I’m too lazy to get up and measure it, but if the average person cups their hands together to make a bowl, it’s about that size. I decoupaged two ceramic bowls to try my hand at it since it’s been awhile, and it turns out it’s like riding a bike πŸ˜€ Picked it right up again with no problem. A few more layers of mod podge and sealant and they’ll be good to go and on the e-store shelves!

    Oh and, um, I know it looks rad and all, but as much as I’m tempted to try and make myself a new set of dishes, one whiff of that varnish stuff and I knew it was decorative-only. You can’t smell anything once it dries (in fact, on that note, these are perfect for potpourri) but I still wouldn’t eat anything off them πŸ˜›

    Unless you’re looking for a cheap thrill, then by all means send a waiver or something my way, ha!

  8. Emerald said,

    September 15, 2008 at 11:25 pm

    @ CuriousC: Gah! You commented while I was replying to other comments. Now it looks like I ignored you. I assure, I was not πŸ˜› The pie is pretty awesome if I do say so myself. I’ve only eaten the one piece, but since my recipes are usually some random recipe found somewhere with my own little tricks and twists, I added a shit ton more butter (seriously, dating a southern man is really good for the self esteem when it comes to the consumption of butter and other things normally shunned in my world). IT. IS. AWESOME.

    In fact, Emerald baking tip #47: whatever the recipe calls for, add more butter. It’ll be harder to work with and maybe not as pretty (save the less buttery, less delicious versions for the judgy mcjudgerson inlaws if that’s their thing) but it is oh-so-worth-it.

  9. Josh said,

    September 16, 2008 at 12:15 am

    Dang man, I want some pie! And all these little artsy projects you’re starting are going awesome. I’m really impressed with how easily you just spew out earrings and bowls and what have you. I gotta find some ways to get my own business groove on now, or else get showed up by my woman. Although … I wouldn’t mind being a kept man.

  10. romi41 said,

    September 16, 2008 at 3:11 am

    damn girl, you make bowls now too??? You are miss crafty supreme, I am so delighted to see what great things you’re doing, keep it up! πŸ™‚

    PS: wine and gelato??? You may not have felt cooled down, but that’s a pretty cool-ass combo, awesome-wise πŸ˜‰

  11. talea said,

    September 16, 2008 at 3:19 am

    It was hot. And it was a lot of gelato. But it was so yummy.

  12. kaylee2 said,

    September 16, 2008 at 4:38 am

    I am not sure how you found Me but, thank you for your comment on my blog! I have been living life rough these days anyway, here I am sitting in a hospital and your goodies are tempting me alot! Dont get that stuff in a hospital, its nore like nasty day old shit! LOL! but, at least the people here are treating me better! Next, time Woulld you put a disclamer on that for me so, i dont look at the food part πŸ˜‰

    PS: Talea is a greayt lady huh?

  13. CuriousC said,

    September 16, 2008 at 10:43 am

    @Emerald – it’s fun when comments happen simultaneously, yes? I assure you that I think not that you were ignoring me. Another great pie tip: lightly brush an eggwhite/half&half wash over the top crust and sprinkle decorator sugar (I use raw cane sugar: big crystals) PRETTY! What kind of pie was it, anyway? I’ve read it twice and keep missing it.

  14. September 16, 2008 at 1:18 pm

    Hey, was that an apple pie? I have a bag full of apples that I bought to eat and they are, not yummy. But they are probably perfect for a pie. I cannot find a good recipe that I want to use online (I’m not as adventurous as you, it seems) and I would love to use the one you used for this….if it’s apple anyway, lol. hook a sisa up!

  15. Emerald said,

    September 17, 2008 at 2:33 am

    @ Le Boyfriend: Well I’m happy you’re proud of me πŸ˜‰ But I don’t know if this will ever be enough to cover both our asses so don’t go counting your earrings before they…hatch. Yes.

    @ Romi: Well I’m trying to be crafty at least. Some days I feel like I’m winging it, but I think that’s my style. And yes, it was an awesome combination. I finished the rest of the wine tonight and it just wasn’t the same without the lemony zing.

    @ CuriousC: That is a good idea, I’ll give that a try next time for some added sparkle and shine. To be honest though, by that point I just wanted the damn thing in the oven so I could get down to some gelato πŸ˜‰ And it was apple pie.

    @ Stephanie: I will! I’m about ready to hit the hay here, but I’ll post the recipe in a bit. I might have to tweak it a bit, because I added much more flour afterwards to combat the stickiness of a 30 degree environment, so I want to make sure it’s good before I post it.

    Oh snap, if I hadn’t been so impatient, I could have chilled it much longer and maybe then it wouldn’t have been so difficult to handle. *mental note*

    @ Talea: It was yummy. But you passed up some good pie. I’ll save you some, but even in scorching heat nothing beats fresh pie.

    @ Kaylee: Found you through Joan, I probably should have mentioned that. I hope you’re doing well, and yeah, Talea’s pretty rocking. πŸ˜›

  16. kaylee2 said,

    September 18, 2008 at 5:48 am

    can i keep coming here or am i unwelcome?

  17. Emerald said,

    September 18, 2008 at 2:05 pm

    @ Kaylee: Of course you can keep coming here, it’s the internet! πŸ˜› Just as long as you aren’t offended by the occasional fit of cursing or the off chance pie.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: